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There’s also the process of updating our minds and changing belief systems we learned from a young age.Īll of these aspects are part of the healing journey, yet they don’t often make themselves known until we are ready to start listening. We need to transform brain patterns that don’t have much to do with our worth. There are questions on a soul level we need to ask and resolve, or understand. Why were we not enough? What was it about us that was unloveable or unworthy?įacing inner trauma and emotional or psychological pain is a process with multiple layers. We have to face the person that has felt rejected and unworthy, and it’s too close it’s too sickening-because, well, it’s painful. If we were not embraced growing up, nor did we feel accepted, heard, or loved for being our true selves, visiting who we genuinely are and listening to the pain of our youth can be anxiety-provoking.
![trauma response trauma response](https://charlestowncoalition.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/TraumaPamphlet-front-535x1024.jpg)
![trauma response trauma response](https://upload.orthobullets.com/question/4604/images/dr1.jpg)
When we don’t know ourselves, this is a strange, unfamiliar place to visit-our true selves. We’re in a sense saying to ourselves, “I give myself permission to hear myself-and ignore the opinions of others.” And that’s not something we are used to. It feels wrong at first, which may explain why we feel guilty for slowing down. It’s about facing the truth, acknowledging our pain, and being open to answers that come from within us.īut in a logical-based world, where we forfeit faith and space in favor of doing everything in our own power-it can be challenging to slow down and listen.įor those of us who have been taught to adhere to the opinions, expectations, and demands of others since a young age, listening to ourselves was not encouraged. Slowing down, to me, is not about stopping or letting go of our “dreams.” It’s not about laziness and doing nothing in life. And it was the first of many moments when I allowed myself to slow down and acknowledge the truth that had been buried. A sense of relief, kind of like when we’re hiking in nature, or a fresh breeze glides along our face, or we take a deep breath. It was like a door opened into a new space, an unfamiliar space. Doing something completely out of my comfort zone ended up feeling good. I noticed a spark of joy flutter into my mind and heart soon thereafter. A sense of lightness saturated my entire being.īut I had to go through some murky terrain to get there. I was worried, almost as if I was looking over my shoulder to see if anyone was going to ridicule me or tell me to shove it back inside.Īs I sat with the discomfort, this moment turned into something incredible. I didn’t feel I had the right to examine what I was feeling.īut in that moment, I chose to look at it and let myself feel whatever I wanted to for the first time in my life. So what was this voice telling me to keep things locked away? I remember thinking, “How dare you feel this way-who are you to complain?” There was no one around, and I hardly ever spoke about my struggles with people. Instantly, anger, sadness, and guilt rose to the surface. When I first started meditation, I was lying on my back, for not even a few minutes until things began to surface (a reflection of how busy I was). Growing up with an extremist religious background, the guilt and grip over me for trying something outside of doctrine was frightening. I entered ever so slightly and carefully into the world of quietness and inner reflection. (A cultish Christianity, not one I vibe with today.) Coming from a religious background, I was afraid of anything remotely different from the Christianity I was raised to believe. Having gone on a long, long journey of self-discovery (and still going until my last breath), I appreciated these words sincerely because slowing down- stillness-has been the key to my healing.īut when I first entered the world of meditation or anything related to “slowing down,” I was not open to it. “Feeling the need to be busy all the time is a trauma response and fear-based distraction from what you’d be forced to acknowledge and feel if you slowed down.” ~ Unknown